Sunday, May 31, 2020

Kids and Counterfeiting

Don't worry--this isn't about teaching your kids to 'get creative' in fixing the economy. This is about making sure your kids know the real deal when they see it when it comes to unconditional love, acceptance, and the security of home.

Retail management and bankers (along with a few other professions) know how important it is to provide detailed training and instruction to their employees on how to identify counterfeit money. No surprises, there, right? But what might surprise you is to know how they do it--or rather, how they don't do it. 

They don't teach counterfeit identification by showing employees counterfeit money. That would be a total and complete waste of time, because when it comes to ways to counterfeit, from what I have read, that infamous line, "...let me count the ways...." would fit perfectly. Instead, employees are trained to recognize counterfeit money by knowing everything there is to know about the real thing. They are trained to recognize EVERY unique identifying mark of genuine currency. From the placement and significance of the characters in the serial number, to recognizing the feel of the raised printing--they are taught to recognize the real thing, so that anything less will automatically set off their 'radar'. 

Okay, now for the take-away...

As parents, we need to make sure our kids wake up to, live in, come home to, and go to bed with nothing less than the real deal when it comes to you--their parents. They need to know without a shadow of a doubt that your love, acceptance, and belief that they are a priceless treasure you value more than your own life, is unconditional, unending, and unshakeable. They need to know you won't pull the rug out from under them when (not if) they do less than their best, disappoint you, make mistakes, and when they don't see themselves in this way. 

Our kids need to know that you, who are their foundation, is real, so that when they are choosing friends, dating, aligning themselves with employers and social circles, and choosing a spouse, that they know how to choose. That they are able to recognize genuine friendship, loyalty, fairness, and the till-death-do-us-part kind of love. 

There is way more than enough counterfeit in the world trying to trip our kids up. There's no way they can learn all the signs and indicators. But when they know for sure and for certain what love, security, and family ARE, they will be able to recognize anything that isn't, and leave it in the dust. 


Love,
Momma D
                          Copyright 2020 Darla Noble. No part of this can be used or copied without permission from the author. 
                                                                                                                     

Sunday, May 17, 2020

Nanna's Pokies

I love gardening and just about anything plant-related. I am especially fond of cacti. My grandkids call them "Nanna's pokies" and are always pointing out things in the store that have a cactus on it saying, "Hey, Nanna, you need that." Okay, so some might even call it a bit of an obsession with cacti. But what do they know, right? 😉

Anyway...

I have quite a collection of cacti, but sadly, as of yesterday, that number has been decreased by one. A cactus I got in Arizona 8 years ago, died. And yes, it made me sad. You see, when I brought it home, it was about 2 or 3 inches tall. When I removed it from its pot yesterday, it was just shy of being 3 feet tall.

So what happened? Well, about a month ago, I decided to rearrange it and the other large cactus it was potted with. For some reason, it was leaning, and nothing else I'd tried corrected the situation. But somehow in the process I injured the plant, and slowly from the inside out, it turned to mush, which is what cacti do when they die. It was a gradual process. It wasn't even noticeable until the last few days. Then yesterday, when I came home from the grocery store, it had collapsed.
Okay, now for the part where I tell you what this has to do with parenting your kids...

Sometimes you say or do things that hurt them without a) you knowing it and/or b) your kids telling you how they feel. They don't show it. They don't talk about it. Like a cactus that seems tough and indestructible with a strong (and prickly) defense system, they put on a good front.

But also just like the cactus, it eats away at them from the inside out. It slowly rips their self-esteem, their confidence, and their hopes and dreams out of their hearts and minds. Until they collapse--not always physically, of course, but they collapse just the same.

And now for the part where I tell you what you can (and should) be doing to prevent this from happening.

Be careful. Handle with care. Watch what you say. Watch what you do. Do unto others what you would have them do unto you. Don't assume they know what you mean or that you don't mean it the way it sounds. Apologize and ask their forgiveness when you do hurt them (because you will). Ask them how they feel and what they think...then really listen to what they say and respond accordingly. Don't expect too much or not enough. Let them know they are more than enough just because they're yours, because after all, that's what parenting is really all about.

Love,
Momma D

                              Copyright 2020 Darla Noble. No part of this can be used or copied without permission from the author.