How many vice presidents can you name? How many of the 56
signers of the Declaration of Independence can you name? Can you still sing the
song you learned in Sunday School naming all 12 of Jesus’ disciples? If you
can, great! But do you realize that other than being named as one of the 12, we
know literally nothing else about 7 of them? Do you know the name of the man
who built the house you lived in? The names of the Supreme Court Justices?
Don’t worry—this isn’t some sort of quiz. It’s just my way
of reminding you that no one’s worth is determined by their notoriety—including
your child’s. Their worth/value isn’t based on their whether or not they are popular,
their piano teacher’s star pupil, a straight -A student, or involved in every
possible extra-curricular activity. It’s okay for your child to be the shy,
silent type—the child about who everyone says, ‘You hardly notice they are
around”. As long as you aren’t one of the ‘everyone’s’ to say that.
Your child should never EVER feel you measure their worth in
the currency of notoriety. Or anything else, for that matter, except for the
simple fact that they are a living and breathing, and beautifully and uniquely piece
of your heart.
I know what I’m talking about when I say it is all kinds of wrong
for a child to grow up feeling the need to prove themselves in order to gain a
parent’s approval, while at the same time getting the distinct impression they
are missing the mark. I know what it is doing to your kids when they are made
to feel under-valued by the very people who should treasure and cherish them ‘just
because’. And just in case you need a reminder of who those ‘very people’ are…it’s
YOU, Mom, and YOU, Dad. It is YOUR job to make sure your kids know that being
themselves is enough to garner your unconditional love. They need to know you
believe in them and that no award or accolade will make you love them any
better or any more. They need to know you don’t dole out your love according to
how much or little they think you need (or deserve) it. They need to know that whether
their mark on the world is one that is seen by many or just a few, and whether
they are 10 or 50, that they can count on you for that ‘just because’ love,
support, and acceptance. They need to know these things so they can go out into
the world with confidence and with that invisible cushion of love that can only
come from you, and that provides something there aren’t really words to
describe, but that every child needs and deserves from the two people
responsible for bringing them here in the first place.
Now, go let your kids know how much you love them.
Love,
Momma D
Copyright 2019 Darla Noble. No part of this can be copied or used without permission from the author.
For more from Momma D, check out "Love, Momma D" at Amazon and Kindle
